Whether you are raising your nephew, grandchild, or other loved one, you need a supportive and seasoned team around you. One crucial part of that team should be the local school where the child is enrolled. However, grandparents and caregivers often feel as if school is the enemy – or at least a stumbling block – in their efforts to help a child thrive.
Create a partnership with your grandchild’s school that puts you on the same team. When you are all working with this child’s best interests at heart, you can be on the same page with their strengths, struggles, and the necessary tools to support them. So how do you do that?
Open Communication is a Key Building Block
The first and most crucial step to building this partnership between home and school is to open a line of communication between you. Whether your grandchild is new to this school or has been a student there for a while, there is still time to write an email introducing yourself and your student. If you prefer to meet in person, email requesting a meeting. Be open, warm, and welcoming in your approach. Let them know that you are interested in supporting your grandchild and the teachers who are supporting them.
Here are two key things to share in your early communication.
1. Your grandchild’s strengths and interests.
Make sure this child’s teachers know what makes this kid tick! If your nephew is a Lego genius, share that. Tell the teacher about your grandchild’s above-average people skills or love of math. Let the teacher know that your nephew volunteers at the animal shelter every week or enjoyed singing in their previous school’s choir. Teachers can learn a lot about how a child learns when they hear what excites them or interests them.
2. The child’s challenges and how you support them at home.
Every kid struggles with something that feels difficult to overcome. Whether it’s prenatal substance exposure, a history of loss, homework battles, emotional regulation, or night terrors and nightmares, they are not the only child in the class to face these adversities. When a child is dealing with challenges at home, the classroom experience can be impacted.
Offer the teacher an honest glimpse into your grandchild’s current struggles. Share what you are trying to support this child at home, like counseling, mentoring, or restructuring bedtime and waking routines.
Of course, it’s natural to want to hold the child’s family story back and not share. However, some of their struggles might stem from that trauma, so weigh carefully what you share and with whom. Remember that your grandchild’s teachers are professionals who understand the interplay of personal life experiences that impact learning. As you build this relationship, you will find a balance that works for your family.
Be Willing to Learn
As you and the teacher get to know each other, they might offer additional resources to help you better understand your grandchild’s academic experiences. Take them in and try to learn what will apply to your student. If it applies to your student, be willing to learn more about the special education services they are suggesting. If they recommend evaluations or testing, ask questions about the process, and take advantage of the information they offer to help you make decisions.
Many school districts have begun offering webinars and meetings to support parents and caregivers. These are excellent learning opportunities about parenting, community resources, learning challenges, or the district’s special education system.
Model Positivity
As you work toward building a solid partnership with your grandchild’s teacher, remember that this child is watching and listening. Try to speak positively and respectfully at home about the school, the teachers, and the opportunities your grandchild will experience this year. When communicating with the teacher, keep your tone open and warm. Express your desire to be a partner in your grandchild’s success and offer your support to the teachers.
Be encouraging.
Teachers appreciate knowing that they are making an impact! You will build a positive tone between home and school when you do things that let teachers know they are valued. One easy thing to do is send short emails that tell them something your grandchild loves about this year’s class.
For example, “Mr. W, we are grateful for the fun way you start each morning. Our grandson, C, always tells us your dad jokes are so terrible that they are awesome.”
Offer your strengths and experience.
Your grandchildren’s teachers will understand how seriously you take this partnership between home and school when you offer your skills or talents as practical support. You can volunteer as a Mystery Reader or math aide, take a turn at holiday party planning, or cut 100 squares for the Language Arts quilt project. You will also reap the side benefit of a quiet but powerful message to your grandchild about how you value school.
Welcome the Opportunity for this Partnership
Creating this partnership will take a willingness to work together, even when it feels bumpy or challenging. If you can welcome the teachers to your Team Grandchild, you can be open to a relationship that supports you and your grandchild this year. It’s mutually beneficial for the teacher to welcome a partnership with you, too. These simple suggestions can help you manage your expectations and keep you open to the opportunities for a successful partnership between home and school.