Homework after school can be a daily struggle when raising a grandchild or loved one with Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD). Many of the steps involved in getting the assignments home and finished requires your grandchild to use skills that are challenging for them:
- Writing down assignments
- Bringing home the right books
- Remembering the lesson presented in class
- Applying “school focus” to the kitchen table
- Returning the homework to school on time
You can support your grandchild’s success at school and home with several strategies. The key is to use these strategies consistently and offer homework help that works for this child. The habits might take some “trial and error” over time. However, when your grandchild’s homework habits catch hold, and their confidence grows, you’ll be grateful that you hung in there with them.
Homework Strategies to Help A Child with ADHD
1. Establish a consistent workspace.
Whether you set up a desk in their room or use the kitchen table, encourage your grandchild to use the same space daily. Make sure that place has all the necessary tools, including pencils, erasers, power cords, a comfortable chair, and plenty of light. Some kids need headphones to block out household noise. Other children benefit from fidget toys to help their hands stay busy while their brains focus. Your grandchild or relative’s child will settle into this space if you give them a voice in what they need and what they like.
2. Establish a consistent work time.
Along with a specific place to do homework, it will help your niece or nephew to have a particular time to do daily homework. Work out a consistent afternoon routine, including a refueling snack and drink, physical activity, and focused homework time. Some kids benefit from an activity break when they get off the bus. Others need a snack and drink first. Ask your grandchild what they need and let them have a voice in planning the routine.
Be flexible while you are trying out what works. But once you get a good routine, support your grandchild by writing the schedule down. Please post it on the fridge or in their homework space to help them stay on track.
3. Keep communication open between home and school.
If you notice that your grandchild struggles to get the assignments from school to home, work with their teacher to set up a system. Some teachers leave time at the end of each lesson for students to write down homework in a notebook. Others post it on their website. Find out what your grandchild’s teachers do and create a consistent plan. It’s also acceptable to ask the teachers to email you the information so you can check what comes home against what is assigned.
4. Learn the difference between procrastination and anxiety.
Your grandchild might tend to put off homework because they are more interested in anything else besides more schoolwork. That’s typical kid behavior, and you will need to work out a few ways to draw them back to task. Try a short break to read a book of their choosing or a ten-minute bike ride before diving into assignments.
However, some kids push homework time back because they are stressed and anxious about what is expected of them. They might need help understanding the lessons or feel overwhelmed by the list of work ahead of them. Step in and be a close presence when you sense that they are putting off homework because of anxiety. Offer to sit with them and talk through each assignment with them. Start with the shortest or easiest task and build from there. Be sure to encourage and point out their successes that day.
5. Offer breaks.
A child with ADHD must work much harder to concentrate and accomplish homework tasks. Consider the type of break that best suits your grandchild and incorporate time to step away from their routine. Here are a few ideas for refreshing their mind and body:
- Yoga or stretching
- Dancing to a favorite song
- Jumping jacks or push-ups
- Singing along to a video
- Reading a graphic novel or comic book
A good rule of thumb is 5 minutes away for every 20-25 minutes of focus, but every child is unique. Learn what works for this child and consider joining them in the break to build a connection with them.
6. Recognize the signs of “Enough.”
Every kid has a different way of expressing that “enough is enough,” and you will have to take some time to observe this child’s signs. You may see them get extra antsy, or their face might turn red. They could start being very emotional (angry, sad, frustrated). Whatever their signs are, learn them and try to step in to help them re-regulate before a complete meltdown occurs.
However, remember that homework is not work damaging your relationship with this child. Be willing to agree that it’s enough for today. Write a short note at the top of the page or email the teacher. Kindly explain that your grandchild’s frustration levels were maxed out, and this is as far as you got today. Then, hug that kid and take a nice walk in the fresh air and sunshine to reset together.
7. Prepare now for tomorrow.
When your loved one has completed homework time, help them clean up their workspace. Then encourage them to pack their backpack with all they need for tomorrow. Have them set it by the door so they are prepared for tomorrow.
8. End with praise.
No matter how challenging the homework time was for you or your grandchild, find something positive to call out to this child. End this time on a high note by praising their perseverance or hard work. Tell them you loved their creativity in writing that story. Please encourage them to find one thing they like about their effort too. If you are raising a younger grandchild, consider a sticker chart where they get one daily sticker for a solid effort. They can redeem the stickers for a small toy or special treat that motivates them.